So I forgot to update here.
I procrastinated on my DIVA (as is the norm with ADHD).
I called the psychologist office on Thursday and was told the assessment would be entirely online. For some reason, I am not big on virtual calls and I wasn't sure if I'd be able to build the initial rapport. (Or maybe it was just my ADHD being ADHD).
I still asked for an appointment on Saturday and was given a 2 PM slot. (I posted the above message a few hours before that).
I then messaged them asking how the online procedure (setup/link) etc. would work and got no response till 12 PM.
My incredible brain decided to use this lack of response as a crutch and effectively had me cancel the appointment.
I then spoke to the doctor and then found another psychologist, more local to me and well reviewed.
Then I procrastinated on two appointments with him.
Appointment 1 - Monday 5 PM
I could've reached on time but intentionally delayed and used that as a reason to convince myself to not go.
Appointment 2 - Tuesday 5 PM
I just called and said I am unable to make it. No excuse. No reason. No internal discussion either
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Waiting has been an issue for me. I make plans to go visit someone and while on the way there I begin thinking about how they'll end. And when I'll be done.
Have been extremely impatient. (Which I was just told was a major ADHD trait).
So then I asked the psychologist for a morning appointment on Wednesday. He agreed for a 11 AM appointment, but then informed me that their parking is undergoing some repairs on that day and so I'd have to find someplace else to park.
On Wednesday morning, I almost used that as a reason to not go. But somehow ended up taking a cab.
The appointment was surprisingly good and easy. He spent a good part establishing a rapport. Took me through various parts of my life...
...and everything came pouring out.
It was extremely cathartic.
He took exhaustive notes and in the end handed me a DIVA questionnaire to fill and sent me to a private room/small office.
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Got the report today and am 9/9 on inattention markers and 6/9 on hyperactivity markers.
Have a visit with my psychiatrist today.
And I fully intend to go. Because for the first time in a long time, my desire to feel better and deal with this is somehow bigger than my inherent procrastinating traits.
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The silencing of the inner monologue (the one I spoke in my earlier message) was honestly eerie at first and now feels extremely blissful to say the least.
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One thing the psychologist pointed out as I spoke was that I was very coherent and able to stay on topic when talking to him, which is not something that people with ADHD usually do. But I pointed out that I was on 10 MG Methylphenidate for the past week and my inner monologue was largely silenced.
Before that I would constantly go on tangents when speaking.
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And now look at moi... Mister Chatterbox.
Just typing out this message has been cathartic.
Hope everyone and you
@roydan feels better.
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P.S - My psychiatrist is from the UK, is associated with the NHS and comes to India twice a year and takes limited patients. He's licensed to practice there as well as in India.
Totally irrelevant information, but I found it pretty fascinating.